I have been meaning to post this for a while, but have been so busy catching up with everything else that I haven’t been able to get my feelings onto paper. It’s also hard for me to admit how much my head hasn’t been in the right place since before the competition and even until now, but I’m going to get this out now so it will help me get past it.
I flew to Ft. Lauderdale, FL on the 17th of June to compete in Figure Universe. I have been wanting to do this competition for years because it’s the second biggest one in the Fitness Universe federation- the biggest is the Vegas competition that I did in November of 2013.
As I mentioned before, I was really distracted the whole time before the competition. We had just moved across the country and I thought that I would have time to get settled and get my mind right before the “get serious” period which starts about 12-weeks out from competition. Between the work that we had done on the house a few months after we moved in and some personal stuff that I was dealing with, I just couldn’t get my head in the game and get excited about my goal, like I had mentioned in earlier posts.
When I got in town and got checked in at the hotel, I started to get excited again. I met some of the girls that I had only met online via our team’s Facebook group and we had a great time together.
I had a photo shoot on Thursday the 18th to get some great promotional pictures for my business as well as went through everything for registration and our team meeting. I was very glad that I had come at that point.
Despite the fact that my nutrition hadn’t been perfect the whole time, I managed to get it together and follow my coach’s plan the last few weeks and for week-of-show too. No one enjoys that week from a dietary stand point- you’re not eating much in order to make sure that you get rid of every last bit of water weight and peak on-stage. But the camaraderie with the girls on my team was great.
I was really surprised at how well I did on the week-of-show diet plan and how good I looked once I got ready on Saturday. What I couldn’t make up for was my lack of posing practice. Like I said earlier, my head just wasn’t in the game so I didn’t practice like I was supposed to- like I had for past shows. So when I went out on stage and was completely nervous. It may as well have been my first time on stage. But I thought I made it through okay still hitting all of my poses. Here are my competition pictures and the comparison rounds with the other 5 ladies (there were 12 total in my category and we did comparisons 6 at a time).
I’m third from the right in the comparison pictures.
I also was judging myself against the other girls in my category and thought I would be somewhere in 4th, 5th, or 6th place. It’s hard for me to admit that, but it’s true. I was really surprised at where my head was at that time- I was focused more on competition than camaraderie. I knew (and have known for a while) that in a very subjective competition, all competitors are at the mercy of judges that have their own idea of what “the best” looks like. When competing, it’s more important to be confident that the package that you are bringing to the stage is your best than to rely on the opinions of strangers- but that’s easier said than done. My head wasn’t in the right place the whole time I was prepping so I don’t know why I would have thought that I was going to somehow magically get better once I got on stage.
Much to my surprise, as the top 5 were called I was upset that I was not in it. It’s funny how that happened in my head- I knew that I didn’t follow the plan and practice my posing like I was supposed to, but I still compared myself to others and judged myself as deserving to be somewhere in the top. By the way, in my post-show check-in call with my coaches they told me I looked slow and flat onstage. I didn’t have a lot of charisma. The two that won my category didn’t even have the right suit, but had the charisma to win the judges attention. That was a hard pill for me to swallow, but I knew it meant I needed to work more on myself before I competed again.
Anyway, as soon as I got back home, I tried to stay on a good nutrition plan, but with no competition in the future, I let some other personal stuff play with my head again and I picked up some bad emotional eating habits.
I hadn’t meant for this to be such a downer post, but I do feel it’s important to be real about my process. I’m human, and although I can look perfect on-stage and in pictures, I have real things that I have to deal with like everyone else. I know that I have to work more on myself, my mindset, and my personal issues before I am ready to compete again. I would like to say that I’m doing Vegas in November since that’s the biggest and most fun competition for my team, but I’m not making that commitment right now.
I’ll be sharing more about my personal journey to getting my head back in the game and take care of my personal stuff. I’ll even post my favorite photo shoot pictures in the future as well as share more great fitness and nutrition tips.
Is there something that you’ve been dealing with that you have been using food to medicate away? Are there any tips and tricks that you want to hear more about in the future? If you have any comments and questions, please let me know.
One Buff Mama